What are the things that you are going to get done, no matter what, no matter how, that's what we're talking about today. Your non negotiables.
You're listening to that music podcast with Bryson Tarbet, the curriculum designer and educational consultant behind that music teacher in the elementary music Summit. Each week, Bryson and his guests will dive into the reality of being an elementary music teacher and how music can truly be transformative in the lives of the students you serve. Show Notes and resources mentioned in this episode can be found at that music teacher.com
welcome. Back to that music podcast. We are going to be talking today about non negotiables. And I don't mean the things that need to be done that would be nice to be done, but like, the things that need done, the things that if you don't like, you're not going to get paid your kid's going to be hanging out at school with because you didn't pick them up. Like, what are the things that must get done? Because I feel like, as teachers, we tend to be perfectionists, where we feel like everything is at the highest priority, and the reality is it's not right. There are obviously things that are more important than others. So what I want you to do, we talked a little bit about this last week, when we were talking about letting the ball drop sometimes, because we have to choose not to be perfect. So if you did that exercise, go ahead and grab that list out. But if you haven't done that exercise, if you didn't listen to that episode, what I want you to do is essentially take a piece of paper and write down every single thing you need to do for the next week, every single thing, picking up your kids from school, getting groceries, cooking your meals, literally every single thing, laundry, every single thing. And then I want you to first give yourself like a pat on the back, because, let's be honest, there's gonna be a lot of stuff on that list. And then we need to figure out, what are the non negotiables? What are the things that, quite literally must happen? Highlight them, put a star next to them. And that's I want you, that's that's the exercise. I want you to talk about your non negotiables, because, let's be honest, we are. We are often going to be in times where we have to figure out what is priority over other things. And those non negotiables should take priority if we try to flip it the other way around and do all the little things and then also do the non negotiables. It's just, you're going to run the time. We only have so much time. I want to introduce a principle from Stephen COVID that I love and we actually use to kind of make our goals here as a company internally. But it's the idea of rocks. So essentially, I'm going to paraphrase this very kind of, probably butcher it, but here we go. So we go. So we have this jar, right? We have this glass jar, and we have some rocks, we have some sand and we have some pebbles. The person was asked to fill the jar with sand and then add the pebbles, and then add the rocks. Well, come to find out, there just wasn't enough room. The rocks were hanging out at the top, you know, falling out. So then he had the person take everything out and do it the opposite way. Start by adding the big rocks, then the pebbles, and then the sand, and miraculously, everything fit. Now, why did it all fit? Obviously, you know, thinking about physics and things, the weight. Reason that it fit is because when it was upside down, it was able to fill in all of those little cracks, you know, the pebbles were able to get closer to the rocks, and then the sand was able to go between the pebbles, and things like that, right? That is exactly what we should be doing with her time. We should be starting with the things that must get done, those things that are core, important to us, the things that are like, right, with our values, you know, family things, the things that you know, if you didn't do your job, you would literally lose your job, that those are where we should start. Those are the things that we should be adding into our schedule, adding into our life first, then we can add some pebbles, right? Maybe these things are they're definitely important. But you know, if they didn't get done, nobody would die if they didn't get done, you're not going to lose your job. You know you might ruffle some feathers if they don't get done. But you know, sometimes that that's the heck that would have to happen, has to happen. Then we add the sand in. So these are the things that like, all right, this would be great for it to happen, but if you know, if it doesn't happen, it doesn't happen. So maybe on a given day, laundry doesn't happen. Maybe it happens on the next day, like, if you're at the end of the day and you're out, you're completely out of time and energy, right? Get your laundry done the next day, right? Or maybe it's something that is, you know, something for work, that is, like, extra right? If you wanted to serve on a committee, or say, someone asked you and said, Hey, can you, can you do XYZ tomorrow? Or can you, can you cover this class? See if it fits. Those are things that, you know, sometimes we have to say, No, I don't have enough room. There's not enough room in this jar for any more sand. There's definitely not any room for any more rocks. And I don't think that's a rock so and kind of going, taking it from that perspective, I love this. Example, because it is exactly true, our life is going to fit what we allow to fit into it, right? The amount of work will always fit the time we give it. I found that out, especially since going full time in the company, if I give myself an hour to record two podcasts, it'll take me an hour. If I give myself an hour to record three podcasts, I'll probably be able to get it done in an hour. The time that we give ourselves often fits the tasks that we have, right? So sometimes we give ourselves way too much time, and as humans, we love to procrastinate and get everything done in the last minute. So what can we do to figure out what those non negotiables are? Put those rocks in the jar, make a plan to make sure those rocks get done. Then add the pebbles into the jar. Figured out when those pebbles are going to get done. Make a plan, and then start adding in the sand. And what I want you to realize is these rocks will change. Sometimes a pebble turns into a rock, sometimes a piece of sand turns into a rock. You know, for instance, for me, that music teacher was was a piece of sand for the longest time, and then it became a pebble, and now it's a rock. You know, the what you what you choose to spend your time on, will change as your family situation changes. You know, I have a toddler now, like things have changed, and I think that it's really important for us to realize that our rocks will change with us. So my challenge for you this week is to do this. I want you to figure out, what are your non negotiables? What are those rocks that if you didn't get done, somebody would die, you would lose your job, or you would feel like your values had been unfulfilled. Write them down, put them on a post it note, put them in your phone notes, whatever. But I want you to write the physically, write them down somewhere so that you can see them in front of you. And then I want you to ask yourself truthfully, are you making sure these aren't your non negotiables? Are they always getting done or sometimes are some pebbles or sand getting in the way? So I'd love to hear from you. What are your non negotiables. Send us a message over on Instagram at that music teacher, or email us Hello at that music teacher.com we would love to hear what your non negotiables are, because what's great about is everyone's non negotiables are going to be different, and that's kind of the whole point. So we'd love to hear from you there, or if you are in that music teacher community, we would love for you to post your non negotiables in the community forum, if you would like to join that music teacher community, which is our membership with that includes a community as well as content specific professional development and a library of pre recorded trainings that you can access at any point. Check out the links wherever you are listening to this episode. So with that being said, I hope that you have learned something new today, or given you a little bit of a kick in the kick in the kick in the you know what to get things ready and make some make some changes in your life and understand what your non negotiables are. And in case nobody else told you lately, thank you so much for making a difference in the lives of the students that you teach you.
